Creative Thinking.

This week I have been challenged in my faith so much. And it's been amazing.

It all started a few weeks ago, as I was reading "Under the Overpass". I realized that I had become lazy in service, lazy in my faith in a lot of ways. My time has been taken up by work, work, and more work (plus moving and learning to live in a community) and I wasn't okay with that. In fact, the day I finished the book I was compelled to go out and serve. I talked to someone who, in the past, I have considered my best friend. He ticked me off that day. He said that I was weird when I started talking about doing homeless ministry... what I inferred from him (whether it was true or not) was that homeless ministry was not something I should be doing. It ticks me off when people tell me what to do, even by not telling me what to do (but implying it). I don't do well with authority, especially from this person as of late.

The whole day I was just mad. Angry. And remained that way until Sunday night (over a week!).

I started reading "Starving Jesus" by Craig Gross and J.R. Mahon a few days ago and started really soaking in what they are saying. They talk about the Born Again Lazy in the book and I realized that a huge amount of time that I spend in my week is dedicated to these very people. Lukewarm Christians. People who believe the Word, proclaim the Word, but rather listen to a 40 minute sermon once a week than actually go out and do what the Word says. They rather just leave the book of James in the dust and focus inwardly. Right now, these are the people I am called to shake up. These are the people who need to recognize that they live in a world with widows and orphans and they are to do something to help these people (in addition to keeping their minds from being polluted by the world!). And by golly, if it takes the tears and the frustrations that have made my soul feel like a thousand ice storms, I'll do it.

In addition, I heard Shane Claiborne speak on Thursday night. He is one of my favorite authors and "Irresistible Revolution" really spoke into my life concerning community living and sharing with the Church. Hearing him speak did the same thing. God started taking my anger (even though I was still very angry that night) and reworking it to open my mind and my eyes to see what He's doing. Shane talked a lot about thinking creatively about the world. Since I am a Christian (although I do not act like it a lot of the time and for that I am sorry), I am different. Look at Jesus. Was He normal? Did He do anything normal according to anyone's standards? Even those closest to Him (His disciples) didn't understand Him (Peter for a long time thought He was to be their political messiah, and let's not even touch on Judas...) but they knew they were different as well. The truth is, we cannot be like the world. If we are friends of the world, if we become like the world and just blend in with society, we are enemies of God.

James 4:4
"You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God."

So what makes us different? How are we to be different? Well, we need to think creatively, look at injustice differently, practice mercy and most of all, show love... in every circumstance.

John 13:35
"By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you love one another."

So I began to ponder as I continued through my week. I still ponder and try to put all of these thoughts that are still forming down in type. How can I, with so much of my time spent at work, be to the orphans and widows what God has called me to be? How can I clothe and feed those who spend their lives trying to survive all while trying to awaken the sleeping church? These thoughts are overwhelming.

James 1:27
"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Matthew 25:37-40
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’"

Revelation 3:16-17
"So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of My mouth. You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked."

Had I become the very person I never wanted to be? Had I forgotten what it was like to live out of the trunk of my car, having a place to sleep only because others invited me in? Am I wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked about God and faith? Am I not seeing the whole picture? AND HOW IN THE WORLD DO I BALANCE ALL OF THIS?!

The long, still drawing out answer started coming from God's mouth on Friday night as my roommate and I spent the evening with three awesome kids. At one point in the night, the oldest (in Kindergarten) pulled out a dilapidated folder from a backpack with one strap and more holes than zippers. As he read words like "the," "girl," and "cat" to me, I couldn't help but notice how amazingly bright this kid is. He wants to learn. He loves school. He absorbs all information put in his path, including how to react to others. He is a natural leader, more mature than almost any Kindergartener I know... and yet who knows how far he will be able to go all because of a stupid thing called money. So be creative... this is an injustice, something our world uses to show value. Then I'm called to show this Kindergartener that he is thee most valuable thing in the world and that our God loves Him- he is God's favorite!

Saturday came and I was again with kids in the morning, doing a service project to feed the hungry (or at least supply them with some tasty treats and some encouragement!). Bringing the city to the suburbs. Bringing the hurt into the comfort, the panic of living in poverty to the calm winter's day spent warm in a church basement. Only a few people came... but it's a start. It's God beginning to break the lukewarmness of the Church with two families who came and served. Two families who saw the need to show their kids what loving God, doing justice, and having faith truly means. They went out of their way to do it and I can only imagine that this is going to have a huge impact on the lives of these children. The truth is, these kids want to serve Jesus. They love helping others. But all too often we don't give them the raw materials to do so. Even though they're small, they're still the Church and seek to be the Church, more than many adults.

Matthew 18:2-5, 10
"He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me... See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven."

I am supposed to teach these kids every Sunday- these kids who have such an incredible faith that I can't compare. I'm supposed to teach them. They teach me, all the time. Even the kids I am around outside of Sunday School constantly teach me. I am striving to be like them in their faith- to be like Jesus, no questions asked. If the Bible tells us to do it, let's do it! Why, because we love God, duh!

Yet here I am as an adult. Faith like an adult because, well, because I'm rational, darn it. Because the world tells me that I am supposed to doubt everything (with the exception of that feeling called love which is labeled "lust" in God's Word), question any rules and regulations put on me. I mean, I went to one of thee most liberal colleges in the state of Minnesota where we were all about protesting and making sure the government passes all the legislature that we see fit. We know what's right because, well... because we as adults do. That's why. But wait! Think creatively!

Sunday came. I went to church at the end of an ice storm. I learned at Sunday School from the Church made up of people 10 years or more younger than me. I went to a church service, where I couldn't focus, couldn't pray, couldn't mean any of the words coming out of my mouth, but could go through the motions.

From there I went to another church service. I had an overwhelming amount of anxiety (and still do as I think about this church service) about being there. God took it away with His Word and calmed the ice storm as I stood in His presence, blessed with the flame in Song of Solomon 8:6-

"Set me as a seal upon your heart,
as a seal upon your arm,
for love is strong as death,
jealousy is fierce as the grave.
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
the very flame of the LORD."

The sermon was about being different, about being a counterculture as Christians. Funny, isn't it? God sometimes hits us over the head with things when He wants us to hear them.

The end of the service came. The anxiety arose and didn't leave as a friend sat me down to dinner. I wanted to puke, scream, pass out, run away... anything to get me away from that table. I did not want to listen to anything he was saying or anything God was saying to me. But Craig Gross says it best in "Starving Jesus"-

"J.R. and I have this thing about honesty. We believe the biggest problems with Christians isn't about filling the pews or worrying about the next big series campaign. Honesty- that's the church's number one struggle... Honesty has been replaced by our needs for fulfilled dreams, passions, and minute-to-minute wants."

If I can't practice honesty with a friend, then I can't practice it within the Church. If I can't let the fortress around me crumble even a little bit, how do I expect anything to change? If I can't let God tear my walls down, then my fruit will be bad fruit because I'm not relying fully on Him. I'm not trusting Him with myself, with my life... how do I expect Him to entrust me with the lives of others? How can I serve or show His love if I am putting Him into a tower in my fortress, telling Him to stay there? I can't, and I won't. And I guess that's the purpose of this whole blog.

Sure, I don't have it all figured out. I don't know how God is going to play out His Word in my life, but I know that I definitely cannot be angry about it... I mean, there's nothing to be angry about at all! But I also know that I can't just sit here and be lazy about doing His will.

"Go and make disciples, share clothing and food, help the widows and orphans, think creatively about justice, keep your mind from being polluted by the world, and shake the sleeping giant known as the Church... just trust Me to do it all with the broken body I have given you."