Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Some days. Are. This.

Some days I just want to scream. Yell. Go on a rampage. Worship You with all I have because honestly, at this point, all I have left in me is just enough to take my guitar, play it hard, and wonder how in the world this is gonna end up.

But I can't do that, the family is sleeping.

But I refuse to just go crawl into bed with a heavy heart. I refuse to let this get the best of me, to get me down. I REFUSE, in the name of Christ, to let this torment me any longer. I am dead to the world, I was bought at a price.

So why, God, does this hurt so badly? Why can't You just take the thoughts away? WHY MUST I DEAL WITH THIS TIME AFTER TIME?! Save me. Save me from this. I want to breath in You and breath out You. I want all of me to be a living being for You and You alone. Please take this away. I beg you. Save me from my enemies. Give me a heart that beats for You. Please. God.

So save me now.

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